Pressure Cooker

Im afraid I can’t tell you much about Beardyman. His intentions and methods aren’t really my concern. ‘Kitchen Diaries’ or ‘Beatbox Chef’ as I came to know it, though, has been a main line source of inspiration and support.

His recipe is simple: Get some good, personal ingredients, mix them together and practise them for years. What he taught me is this;

Keep Going,

Keep Going,

Keep Going.

I’ve reproduced the recipe; the video is below.

Electro-FunkDaddy Superstar Break.


  • 1 808 Clap
  • 1 Dry Snare
  • 1 909 Clap Snare
  • 1 Kick
  • 1 Base
  • Mixed Synths
  • 1 Shuffle (Household White Noise)


Preheat the oven to 700°F

Filter the white noise using a sieve. You want to reach a point where all of the middle frequencies are left behind. You should end up with a more tinny sound within a rhythmic consistency. You can test the rhythm by giving the white noise a spin.

Spin the White Noise and add the remaining ingredients in order: 808 Clap, Dry Snare, 909 Clap Snare, Kick, Base, and the Mixed Synths. Be careful of stray hairs, and you should, at this stage, have a the beginnings of a great break.

Please note that some recipes will encourage you to add fish at this stage. Don’t do it.

Place the base break into an oven proof dish and bake for three years at 700°F.

Remove from oven and enjoy with friends until you can’t stand.



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